Most people who follow the Real Housewives of Atlanta know Kandi Burress, former lead singer of group Xscape and songwriter. Kandi shared her engagement with the world on the show and also shared the fact that her family was not happy with AJ Jewell, her fiance.
On Friday, October 2, during the late night hours, AJ was “relaxing” at the Body Tap strip club on Marietta Blvd in downtown Atlanta when he was involved in a fight and lost his life due to a severe head injury. Fox Story
Some believe things happen for a reason. The engagement was reportedly suspended. Did Kandi’s family get their wish. Was Kandi spared of a greater fate down the road. What do you think?
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I do feel bad for her b/c the situation is sad. But her mom was not happy about them being together ..wonder why. Mama really could’ve known best.
It is rather sad. Based off the show, AJ seemed like a good guy and although the stakes were against him, things happen for a reason. I’m not saying anyone should die for any reason, but God allows things to happen to either make way for better or prove a point to those around.
@Kandi:
I’m pretty startled at this response. So if your boyfriend/fiance’s mother doesn’t approve of you and you died would his “mama know best”?
@Derrick:
People die because they die.
This is a sad situation and I would hope that her mother is not gloating at the fact that he is not in the picture anymore.
@Marcus:
You’re scaring me with comments like that. People die because they die. Sun shines because it shines. Water is wet because its wet. riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Sir, there is meaning to everything. If you were not fearful of dying then why avoid Iraq, why not hang out in the “hood”, why do you make so-called “safe” decisions about your life? Our lives are results of choice and decisions. Some decisions could and have led to death. God grants you your mindfulness. AJ made a not-so-good decision Friday night.
I couldn’t care less about any of this.
@Marcus:
You’re startled at MY response?! I beg your pardon Mr. “people die because they die”! My comment was not intended to be indicative of anything negative. And agreeably, just because Kandi’s mom did not approve of their relationship, no it was not a reason or justification for his death. Me saying mom knew best was simply reiterating that mothers, as all women, have intuition about certain things and certain people. Her mom felt strongly about them not being together and the real reason why we may never know. However, as Derrick pointed out, things happen for a reason. Always have. Always will.
People come from all schools of thought, was this God’s doing? Was this karma? Did mom set him up? Whatever your reasoning, this is sad. Anytime a another human purposely takes another life this is sad regardless of if he was a bad person or not.
@Kandi:
I like to think things do not happen for a reason, people find reasons to match or to fit the situation at hand. Not to make this personal, but I don’t think any one should be so naive to believe such statements. Things happen, period. You may learn a lesson from past events but the event did not happen to teach you a lesson.
@Marcus:
Well said, people die b/c they just do.
@Emcee:
If “people die b/c they just do”, does this mean that you don’t make decisions in your life that are progressive and sustaining to your life?
@Marcus:
Do you care about what you eat, do you go to the doctor, are you selective of friends? Why? If people die because they just die, why do you care about these things?
@ Emcee: Do you believe in God?
@Kandi:
Woman’s (and Man’s) intuition have been wrong many a time. Just because a person was mercilessly beaten to death doesn’t mean her intuition was right.
@Derrick:
. If I’m scaring you with comments like that then prepared to be mortified my friend. I’m not fearful of dying. I’d prefer that it not happen tomorrow, but its a natural event and when it happens it happens. At my funeral, I’d prefer for people to say “Marcus was a nice guy, he did what he could, and then he died”.
Dude, did you seriously reply to me twice before I could respond. I must have touched a nerve
There are events in life that have significant meaning but EVERYTHING that happens doesn’t happen for a reason. If it did, then somebody would KNOW the reason.
To answer the question that you asked me twice in separate posts, I perform the following acts for the reasons listed below:
* I avoid Iraq because I’ve never once had the desire to shoot at people I don’t know.
* I don’t hang out in the hood because I don’t have a reason to.
* I care about what I eat because I’m educated on what is good and bad for the body. All things being equal I’d prefer to eat things that are good for me.
* I’m selective of my friends because I enjoy the company of like minded people.
I make decisions based on my experience and intellect, not because of a grand design. I haven’t cracked open my Bible in a while, but maybe I missed the part about a man getting beaten to death and leaving six children without a father as the way to get a point across.
My bad.
Well said Derrick and Kandi. Everything does happen for a reason. Not somethings…everything. It is truly sad to hear about AJ losing his life the way he did. My heart goes out to his family, especially his children.
@Nita:
So I man is beaten to death and there is a reason for it. Care to share what that reason is?
@Marcus:
EVERYTHING does happen for a reason. No, somebody does KNOW. YOU don’t know EVERYONE, so you will never embrace that statement.
1 – Everyone in Iraq is not there to kill someone.
2 – I wasn’t graced with a silver spoon. I don’t think you were either. Ergo, you left the hood. You chose to leave it. (Kudos to you) But I’m pretty sure you wanted a safer environment for you and yours.
3 – Sir, if you can decipher good and bad, they you know they are not equal. Newsflash! Bad leads to death. That’s why you choose the good.
4 – People of intellect tend to be less dangerous. Not always. But I doubt you have intellectual friends that keep you in bar brawls, fights, and shoot outs.
I’m just saying….
And had you cracked your Bible open lately, you would know that fathers losing lives as well as only begotten sons losing lives have occurred before. And this was for the betterment of the world and more lives. I’m not saying that this was good for AJ or his kids, but this could have been life sparing for his kids, Kandi, or some other unknowing individual. Fact is, you don’t know.
@Derrick:
Are you proving any points or are you just rewording what I’m saying to prove mine?
Back to my original question. Do YOU have any clue why the man got beaten to death? At this point you can tell me it was to preserve the Arabian Horse population of Atlanta. Just give me something besides “shoulder shrug” or “everything happens for a reason (but I can’t give you the reason)”.
@Marcus:
Nope, Derrick doesn’t know. He was at home sleep. See if one of the guys that did the A town stomp knows. You don’t know them, so you hence your lack of a supporting answer. Stay tuned for the court case. You will get your WHO then.
@Kandi:
I believe there could be a higher being, but to me personally the jury is still out. Too many holes in the great book and too much evidence of evolution.
@Derrick:
I make intelligent decisions for my life, but even in these decisions anyone, anything and at anytime could happen and regardless of your decisions your life could end.
what a cluster f*ck
No matter what the reason is it’s sad now his kids will grow up with a father..
@Marcus: I would, but question is would you be open to receive what I have to say? First thing first…do you believe in God? Your answer to that will determine if you can/will receive what I have to say. If you aren’t willing to believe that everything happens for a reason, then you surely wouldn’t want to hear what I have to say. But here goes… I believe that he had an option that night and made the wrong one. I believe that warning comes before destruction. So at some point, God may have tried to warn him and he didn’t take heed to it. So many times we look at things with a carnal mind and can never grasp what is happening when it is all spiritual.
@Nita:
Nita, are you saying that the only reason he died on that day was because he went to the strip club? I would not go so far and say such a statement, while I do believe being at the strip club probably lessened his chances to see another day I believe that if someone is determined to take your life they will find you at Kroger also. No one “picks the death option” as you say, that is similar to saying, “I had a friend who got hit by a drunk driver at 3am, they made the wrong choice by being out at such an hour.” While God may send messages at times, but everything is not a message.
@Emcee:
I see Nita’s point. We all have choices. And his choice was to attend the strip club. You agree that it lessened his chances which means that he possibly had a choice to attend something else. I mean the Religious convention WAS going on at the GWCC down the street on the same night. I don’t think someone was out to take his life. It was actually reported that AJ started the brawl. But I’m pretty sure he would be less successful in finding a sparing partner at Kroger.
I actually did have a first cousin die at the hands of a drunk driver at 2 AM. My cousin was leaving work and heading home. And innocent as this was and sad as it was for my cousin who did nothing wrong to lose his life. I taught me and my other cousins and several friends at school the dangers of driving drunk. I feel that was God’s message to me and others. Maybe my cousin’s life was a sacrifice for many more lives.
@Nita For that line “warning comes before destruction” tell that to the dead in Indonesia. Oh, we have earthquake prediction systems. Yup, they tell you when an earthquake is happening a few seconds before it does. Maybe all those people had dreams saying “we should leave huh?”
@Emcee Evolution doesn’t refute the existence of a higher being. Just a creation story made thousands of years ago before man even knew what an atom was. Explaining evolution to people with knowledge is hard enough now. Imagine explaining it before people even knew the Earth was round.
At any rate, it is impossible for this to be a sign that AJ wasn’t the man for her. The dude is dead so its a declaration that this isn’t the man for you. Then again, this is only important if soulmates are real. Which as we know throughout history, all marriages were arranged up until recently.
@miked: Evolution does refute creationism though IFF we believe in God creating a perfect human…because if we were perfect in the first place…yadda yadda
@Emcee: But which version of creation are we talking about. Genesis 1 or Genesis 2? And you’re right, evolution would refute creationism as in God just made everything in six earth days and took an earth day off to rest. However, whose to say he didn’t start evolution in the first place for biological organisms and the Genesis author was given the synopsis. LMAO, this is only still being debated in this country because Americans think science is evil.
I just went to the restroom and there was no toilet paper. I get the message now
@Marcus: LOL What was it?
@Emcee:
The message was basically that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes you use the restroom and you realize that your hand is your best friend. Without this experience, I may have never started buying the 72 pack of toilet paper.
@Emcee: Yes, I am saying that he died that night because of going to the strip club. If, perhaps, he was at the Kroger…I don’t believe it would have happened like that. Again, God gives us choices. We put ourselves in these situations, and don’t have enough wisdom to get out of them. Maybe he could have made the decision to be with one of his six children. Maybe God could have been drawing him elsewhere. Not saying that people shouldn’t go out and enjoy their lives, but we need to be wise about where we go. When going to such places as strip clubs, we subject ourselves to all the negativity that is surrounded in those places. It is not like the person that killed AJ came to his house and hunted him down. Some people do choose the death option. Just in reading Ezekiel in the bible…I learned how people choose the death option. They decide to do their own things and not listen to God. Death was their choice. In your scenario of the 3am friend who got killed. We don’t know the warnings and messages God could have given that person before they got in their car…there is a message behind everything. Some people ignore them.
@miked: Sorry, I won’t be able to tell them…their dead. How do we know that God didn’t warn them too? Could have been dreams, could have been a messenger…could have been a prophet….could have been a donkey. Perhaps they just didn’t listen. Or could be…it was just there time to go. God gives us chances and choices. In my life I have found that if I would have listened to what God had to say and not make decisions off of what I wanted…I wouldn’t have taken a detour to my destiny. Again, those were choices I made…not all good ones, but they were mine. Thank God He gave me chance after chance to do better. Now that I have learned…I try to do better and listen to Him and not me. Choices…
@Nita: I want to know what warning you got when you got measles or the chickenpox?
What warning do people get when they get some kind of crazy cancer thats slowly turning their brain into teeth other than the crazy headaches? And then at that point, what could they have done about it since they were warned apparently? You’re really going to propose that the people that die in random natural disasters had warning signs they were about to occur? Or that people whose lives are ruined by them had special warnings?
Maybe you should ask some atlanta flood victims if they had a feeling they should have a bought a house on higher ground when they bought their house. What was their warning sign before they bought that house?
@miked: @miked: I was very young. Not really sure of what symptoms I had. I guess you just looked over the, maybe it was there time statement. Or now maybe I should say their time or their trial and tribulation. Everyone is different. The bible speaks about how we will have sorrow. It is how we deal with it to receive the prophecy that joy will come in the morning. Just like the blind man in he bible. He was born blind and the disciples questioned Jesus on why was he blind. Jesus told them that it happened to him so that the power of God could be seen in him. What can the cancer victims do? They can turn to the only One that could help them. God. We have all been warned. It tells us all about it in the bible. It’s not that the Atlanta victims should have bought a house on higher ground…it could have been a prayer to ask God to cover their home and protect it from the storm.
@Marcus: I’m not a real religious guy like some of the evangelists on this board, but I know a malicious act when I see one. If a man can’t go to the titty bar and enjoy himself without dying, I wouldn’t necessarily say it’s the man’s fault.
Now if I were a real religious guy, I would like to think that MY GOD wouldn’t take somebody’s life to teach me a lesson. Seriously, does God get pissed off and say… “let’s take a life today and teach somebody a real good lesson.” I believe that is the devil perhaps or the antithesis of God. Think I’ll head to Magic City tonite, please pray that God doesn’t teach anyone lesson tonite.